Have
you ever been surprised by how a friend of yours, who comes from a
very conservative family, thinks? Did she/he sound narrow-minded or
very sexist? Well, this may be because of the way they are brought up
and because of their family traditions. Often, children, who grow up
in very conservative families, are given only half-truths and have
many misconceptions about (mostly) taboo topics.
In the
majority of conventional families, girls are not are not even aware
that there is a natural process called the menstrual cycle. This
leads to them freaking out when they get their first periods. Not
only that, but they also feel very negatively about their body until
they get used to their periods. They do not understand why they have
to go through such a 'disgusting' process and are ashamed of
themselves. They are, in my opinion, forced to follow certain
procedures without getting an explanation as to why they have to do
it. In most traditional families, they cannot have any physical
contact with other people, clothes, they cannot sleep on the bed,
they cannot enter the kitchen etc. They also do not feel comfortable
when this topic comes up in their education, predominantly in
biology, while learning about the reproductive system.
But
girls are not the only ones affected by the incomplete information on
periods, even boys are. They get a wrong perception on what girls
have to go through and instead of being understand during this time,
they mock girls who are on their periods and laugh about them. This
only makes girls draw themselves back from any social interactions
when they have their periods. They do not have the confidence to
accept this natural process and get defensive by any comments boys
make about periods, as though it is a bad thing.
The
next fallacy is about interaction and relationships with the opposite
gender. Here are some popular things, that traditional families say
about boys to girls: they take advantage of you, you can't have any
guy friends, all boys are bad and cunning, they always have an
ulterior motive while interacting with you etc. All these judgmental
comments create a long-lasting prejudice against men. This makes them
look at all men as cheaters and rapists. However, teenage girls have
an urge to bond with the opposite gender because of peer pressure and
of course hormonal changes. This causes an internal clash, which
makes them hide friendships and other relationships with boys to
their parents/families. This leads to a lack of trust between them,
which is a serious problem in the future.
As you
all know, prejudices that girls have against boys affect both sides.
Girls may have a false perception and an internal clash, but boys
have emotions too right? How do you think innocent boys will feel, if
we categorize all boys under 'evil' or even worse: 'rapists'?
According to me, this is one of the main reasons for the aggressive
behavior many boys show towards girls and also all the stereotypes
that girls are given by them. We must not judge someone for something
another person of the same gender does.
But
most boys who grew up in traditional families are also in the same
situation as girls. They are also have hormones and certain cravings,
under which the urge to have a relationship is very predominant. But
the biggest irony I've heard about is when a traditionally brought up
boy has a younger sister. In most cases as such a boy thinks it is
okay for him to have a relationship with a girl, but when his sister
has the same wish, she isn't 'allowed' to. I understand that they
have a natural instinct to protect their sisters, but can't they see
the irony of the situation? What if his girlfriend has an elder
brother, who thinks the same way as he does? This is something boys
should really consider, while having a relationship. The way they
behave with their girlfriend is the same as someone else may behave
with their sisters.
I'm
not against whatever conservative families say and the way they bring
up their children. But in my opinion, many things that they preach do
not apply to the modern society and culture. It affects the
teenagers' perception of themselves and the other gender. I think we
should be given the chance to form our own opinions, without being
forced into following something. In the end, we may choose to follow
what our families taught us, which is perfectly alright. But we have
to be given the freedom of choice. It really helps clear stereotypes
and prejudices. So the next time, think before you blindly judge someone
and also how you would feel if someone does the same to you. Be
open-minded.
– R
*I'm
not rude, I'm outspoken.
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